This world is hopeless, but I love it anyways.

My sophmore year english teacher just found me on myspace ...
And the first thing he did, was send me an assignment that I wrote for his class, back in 2002.
It goes a lil' somthin' liek this:

People Watching: Not Just Voyeurism
By A. Walker, 5/19/02

I was exhausted from walking around all day. In spite of the fact that my last name is "Walker", I was dead tired. It was a Saturday; I woke up at 7 that morning. I usually wake up around noon on Saturdays. I had to wake up; it was the second day of the Ohlone Drama competitions, which meant I would find out if I made finals that afternoon. Eventually, I found out that I didn't make finals. By that time, I was very hot and bothered. I found a nice bench to sit at on top of a hill. I began to zone out, and just people watch.

I squatted on that bench, sighing in relief. I gently blinked my eyes. Then my mind just cleared. I let my eyes focus on the people strolling by in front of me. My attention wandered to the boys playing catch in the lawn area. I was overwhelmed with an omniscient feeling. My mind was slipping into another world. I began to see things quite differently.

Sitting on that bench, I was elevated about one hundred feet from the world. People looked like ants milling around. The sight was almost humorous. It was if I was peering down from the heavens, and watching the world evolve. Time melted away like the wax of a candle after the wick burnt its way down. I had tunnel vision. I forgot about everything. The light became brighter, and everything else faded. The people hypnotized me.

I fell into a new realization. I saw that everything that we do can just go unnoticed for all eternity. Unless we gather as one, we won't be recognized. Sure, I noticed individuals. They were seen but not recognized. If I saw that person again, I wouldn't remember them, unless they did and had something that set them apart from everyone else. That thought triggered something else in my mind.

I had a mysterious revelation. I've heard before from others, but it has never sunk in until that moment. High school is a time when everyone tries to figure out who they are. During this phase, you notice what people will be like the rest of their life. People's true character shines the brightest during this epoch of life. However, there are some people that never develop any character, and remain childish throughout life. My mind boggled these awkward thoughts like a drunken ambles through an alley.

After I finished dwelling on those thoughts, I became aware of myself. My routine, does it appear just to be milling around. I noticed my beaten paths. I began to question myself. "What do I do that sets me apart from everyone else?" More questions popped up in my head, until it was clouded and I couldn't think straight. I was confused and scared, then, BOOM!

It all went away, I saw things peripherally again. I heard my girlfriend talking to me, and I responded with a, "huh? What's up?" I didn't mention anything of my day dreaming. I kept it to myself. My little gift. Every so often it comes back to me. I get my sight back. I see this "sight", as a kick back into reality. It shows me what is really going wrong.

Life is simple. We get so caught up in our personal worlds that we lose track of where we are. Our habitat closes our mind. It is only when we look down at our habitat that we can realize what's going on. One can understand himself and the world just by people watching.


can you dig it?
i can.
hollar.